dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
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