why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I think my moral compass just broke
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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