PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
