She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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