Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize