Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
His hands were made for my vagina.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
