I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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