Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
