butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
