i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
