i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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