Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
