btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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