If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
