I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
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did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
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I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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