Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
