Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
