i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
