Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
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