Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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