there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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