Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
