Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch. http://tfl.nu/r7zt
  Replies (2) Good night (787) Bad night (1527)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on http://tfl.nu/mwkb
  Replies (29) Good night (2967) Bad night (840)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  so then she threw up in his asshole

  (1-231): View more from Michigan

  yep..that'll do it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): so then she threw up in his asshole (1-231): yep..that'll do it. http://tfl.nu/f3qy
  Replies (15) Good night (770) Bad night (4532)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture? http://tfl.nu/hrqs
  Replies (4) Good night (1519) Bad night (3897)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar http://tfl.nu/bcnl
  Replies (37) Good night (1468) Bad night (9564)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars http://tfl.nu/6xt5
  Replies (21) Good night (7279) Bad night (1001)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done http://tfl.nu/wa0d
  Replies (9) Good night (1102) Bad night (4409)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink. http://tfl.nu/iqnv
  Replies (3) Good night (2400) Bad night (975)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game. http://tfl.nu/w4nu
  Replies (16) Good night (1106) Bad night (2735)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.

  (1-301): View more from Maryland

  I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy. (1-301): I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok. http://tfl.nu/z40b
  Replies (16) Good night (3046) Bad night (702)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life? http://tfl.nu/j85t
  Replies (3) Good night (775) Bad night (1013)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (623): That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party. http://tfl.nu/6ozh
  Replies (12) Good night (600) Bad night (841)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now http://tfl.nu/jv07
  Replies (0) Good night (669) Bad night (343)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped! http://tfl.nu/5pnp
  Replies (2) Good night (1014) Bad night (313)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands http://tfl.nu/d99g
  Replies (17) Good night (318) Bad night (458)

Randomize