how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
