last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
