I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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