I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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