He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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