Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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