At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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