Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
