It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
