You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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