ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I can't put those talents on a resume
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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