Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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