The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
