this beer tastes like vomit already
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
