There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize