i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
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