it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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