I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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