i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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