what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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