Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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