Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
