i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
where am i from again
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
