think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
