you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
