Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
