I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
tell your sister to shave her snatch
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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