Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
