Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
