ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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